How often do you berate yourself for not having your life sorted out earlier? I’ve passed the big five-oh, and occasionally wonder if it’s too late for me to be starting out on my mission to become a life-altering author and teacher. That if I haven’t done it by now, it’s probably too late.
And if you listen to motivational speakers like Brian Tracey and Jack Canfield, they may sometimes say that if anyone hasn’t established this habit or routine in their life by now, then they’re losers because they will just never change. And I think, well I guess by their definition, I must be a loser, so what’s the point of reading any further.
Fortunately, I’m stubborn. And I just love learning, so I read on.
Recently I had my big epiphany.
What if my disorganisation, my lack of success to date, my many starts and changes of direction are actually part of the bigger plan? What if my particular mission is to help others out of the wilderness of restrictions and “wasted” time and opportunities, by finding a way to transcend a lackluster past, and finally be the success we all dream to be.
I’ve always been a bit of a late starter. I didn’t start dating until after I finished high school. I didn’t start uni until I was 25. I got married for the first (and only) time at 35. I was 44 when I finally stopped renting and bought my first home.
Frankly, the suburban lifestyle has always bored me to tears. I have always followed a different game of finding meaning and purpose to my life, which was much more important to me than fitting in with what everyone else was doing. So I comfortably call myself a “misfit” who can’t abide playing political games for very long.
This is why I’ve never built a career of any great depth, or continued with postgraduate university studies. Power games just aren’t my scene. And that comes at a price, in this world where power games are what makes our society function as it does.
Which is why my day jobs tend to be at the low-skilled end, because I am loathe to share my creative energy. I am very greedy about my creative energy – I want to use it for MY projects and not for any corporate priorities.
Thus, my outer appearance in this world can appear to be as a “loser”.
But by being on the outside, and pursuing what I value (not what others value), I have earned and been granted so many treasures that the mainstream populations yearn for. Like knowing what my purpose is, like knowing what makes me happy, like rehabilitating my beliefs and attitude to work for my highest good, like discovering “what it’s all about”.
And I harbour a secret passion – to become a life altering author and teacher. To share the joyous secrets I’ve discovered, the new connections I’ve created, the lessons I can help to shortcut.
One of the reasons I resist writing blog posts is because I haven’t figured out whether to establish and maintain the persona of a dynamic expert with high energy and enthusiasm, or to reveal myself as who I think I am – someone with a lot of knowledge, passion and dreams, but with some issues to still figure out – mainly money and success.
Do I let you see my flaws and risk your dismissal of me and all that I can offer?
Or do I let you see my journey – past, present and future – so that it can be of comfort and hopefully inspiration to people who are ready to hear my message. That message being not only the specialty that I have chosen (the energy of the environment) but also how I live my life.
Maybe I can be both? I AM both! The dynamic expert with energy and enthusiasm AND the real person.
